Tuesday, March 22, 2011

To Fall In 'Second Love'

We have all heard stories about first love and the first time experience of falling head over heels for someone etc but what about second love. The second time you find love after your first break up. A second relationship after learning from previous mistakes. A second hope of finally finding true love.

As first love has an unmatched charm, the first break up leaves the person with wounds. Wounds which only love and mend again and thus, most of the time though we swear to never fall on love again, we find ourself searching for the right person until we find one. With all the hope and wish but what if the second love too may not work out. My friend whom I have seen suffering her first break up and then falling in love again, was very upset yesterday night, as she could feel that her second relationship was also at stake for certain situations. She then asked me 'why don't we learn? Why do we find second love?' This is what I told her -

1.Law Of Attraction – The universal truth is that there is always a factor of attraction between a boy and a girl. That's why it is often said that a girl and boy can never remain friends, they tend to fall in love. Thus, during a break up, when you get support from the opposite sex who happens to be your friend, finally concludes to be the second love.

2.Expectations Met – The basis of every break up is unfulfilled expectations. When we don't get something from someone we expected it most from, we move away and at that time when another person fulfills all the expectations without even having to ask him/her, one cannot help but fall in love.

3.Emotional Support – A break up has an inverse effect on our emotions and more than the feeling of loosing someone, it's the fear of being alone once again, hurts the most. The position of a lover is of great importance in everyone's life and to find that place suddenly empty, is painful. Thus, to fill up the gap, to maintain the emotional support, we tend to find love again.

4.Was A Friend, Now A Lover – Most of the time if you notice, the second person in your life is mostly the best friend. Believe it or not, he/she becomes our love as it's the safest option. We know him, we can trust him, the risk of getting hurt again is less and thus, he is the best choice.

5.Expectation Of A Better Future – No matter how much fun we make of Karan Johar romantic dreamland movies, deep in our heart that is exactly what we wish. A perfect lover and specially after a break up, the needs becomes a necessity. With the perfect person standing right next to us, expectation of a better future gets us involve into second love.

To fall in love for the second time for these five reasons most likely may or may not end up being successful. So, the next time you are on the verge of falling in love for the second time, check yourself for these five factors.

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