Will your heart ever heal from your break up?‏

We're here to tell you that you can heal. No matter how
troubling your breakup was, you can feel better, even happy,
again. 

It all starts with a choice and a shift. 

We know that sounds like we're minimizing your pain but
believe us when we say that that's not the case.

We know how painful a break up can be and we also
know that it doesn't feel like a choice--but if you will
bear with us, we'll explain. 

Make the choice to heal.

As simplistic as it may sound, when you make a deliberate
decision to turn toward healing, you can often start feeling
better quicker than you thought possible. 

Sometimes, we cling to our painful thoughts and memories
around the breakup because we are afraid that if we let go
of the agony, we will negate any chance there might be
(especially in our minds) of reuniting. 

On some level you might want nothing more than to just go
back to the way things were...even if you know that breaking
up was for the best--and your partner may have moved on
anyway.

It is understandable that you might feel this way. 

We encourage you to ask yourself this: "Is carrying around
the pain and hurt serving you?"

If it isn't, maybe it's time to make the choice to heal. 

You could write down on a piece of paper an affirmative
statement of your intention to heal. 

For example, you might write: 
"I am ready to feel better and once again turn toward
happiness."

Make a shift. 

Congratulations on making the decision to heal your broken
heart. (*If you still can't make such a choice, be patient
with yourself and keep reading this.)

In order to put your healing into full motion, it's time to
make a shift. 

When you make a shift in the way that you think about
yourself, your ex and the relationship that ended, you can
begin to move toward improvement.

**One powerful way to make a shift toward healing is to
become an observer to your thoughts and beliefs. 

Let's face it. 

When you think to yourself something like, "I will never
find love again," it is your thought that is causing you
fear and sadness, not necessarily the reality of your life. 

After all, you simply can't know what the future holds for
you. 

Get into the habit of paying attention to what you are
thinking and believing. 

When a particular thought becomes fixed in your mind,
question that thought or belief the way that someone outside
your situation might do. 

You could start out by asking yourself, "Do I know ________ 
to be absolutely true?" 

Many times, realizing that what you are believing is not
necessarily accurate or true can help loosen the grip that
the painful thought seems to have over you. 

**Another way to make a shift toward healing is to broaden
your view of your own life. 

For many people, the pain of a broken heart can eclipse
everything else going on in life. 

Without being judgmental of yourself, start to look around
at the other people and things in your everyday world.

Are there friends or family members who you could devote
more time to? Perhaps there are projects at home, work or
related to a hobby that you haven't attended to lately. 

What is already present in your life that you couldn't
previously see because you were so focused in on the
breakup? 

Be gentle with yourself and don't force things. But, begin
to look up from your intense feelings and see what you see. 

Follow your heart and your interests and expand what you are
focused upon. 

We aren't for one minute suggesting that you should stuff
down the sadness, grief or anger that you might be feeling
about the breakup. 

Instead, we are urging you to feel what you are feeling and
then bring yourself back to the people, places and things
that are waiting for you right here and now. 

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Can you get AIDS from oral sex?

With the plethora of information existing about the transmission of HIV and AIDS, it hasbecome harder and harder to separate fact from fiction. We tackle the transmission via oral sex issue.....
There are still many questions being asked about the virus, primarily exactly how it can be passed from one person to another. Some people believe that oral sex is a way of side stepping the issue, but the reality is a lot bleaker than you’d think.

Since the HIV virus is transmitted via blood, semen or vaginal fluid, any activity which involves exposure to these substances necessarily leaves one open to contracting the virus, which can eventually evolve into full blown AIDS. 
Safe sex or abstinence remain the only options for avoiding transmission entirely.
It has been proven that HIV can be contracted through oral sex with an infected individual

While statistics as to the degree of risk involved with oral sex are not known, it has been proven that HIV can be contracted through oral sex with an infected individual. And it can happen whether the infected partner is giving or receiving oral sex.  
Transmission this way is less common than it is with unprotected vaginal or anal sex, but it is still a very real possibility.

Exactly what are your risks?
If the person performing oral sex has HIV, the virus can enter their partner when blood from their mouth enters the urethra or vagina or enters open cuts or sores anywhere on the body. The risk of exposure is equally high if the person receiving oral sex has the virus and their blood, semen or vaginal fluid enters their partner’s system through cells lining the mouth.

The risk can be further increased if the person receiving oral sex ejaculates into the mouth of their partner or if they have another STD, which compromises their immune system. Simply put, with the exchange of bodily fluids it is almost impossible to avoid the transmission of sexually transmitted diseases, including HIV and AIDS.


Precautions to reduce your risk of HIV infection

Of course, as with other forms of sex, there are precautions which can be taken which can help to reduce your risk of infection.
Using a condom is the most responsible option, offering both partners peace of mind. If one or both partners have an allergy to latex, plastic condoms are also available. 
Other forms of protection including a dental dam or a condom cut open into a square and placed over the vagina can offer a further barrier to fluid transmission during oral sex.


Avoid oral sex if you have open cuts in your mouth

Anyone with open sores on or in their mouth should avoid engaging in oral sex as this leaves them wide open to any number of bacteria and viruses entering directly into their bloodstream. If you or your partner are aware that you are HIV positive, you should exercise extreme caution when considering sexual intercourse of any kind.

When it comes to HIV and AIDS, there is no such thing as being too careful
Don’t assume that oral sex will give you a safe way around the subject.  Nothing is guaranteed except sex with protection or abstinence.  Whatever you opt to do, make sure you take every possible precaution. Your health is too precious to risk … for the prospect of an evening’s pleasure!

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