Wednesday, April 6, 2011

Communication-mini course-introduction DAY 1


Hey everyone, I find that the MAIN problem people face in their intimate as well as daily relationships with people is the lack of communication or the inability to communicate effectively so I'm going to start a 10 day FREE, e-course to help everyone with this problem.


I suggest that you print out each lesson to make reading the 
material and answering the questions easier. 

Introduction: 

There are four ways that people communicate in relationships. 

1) People communicate "unconsciously." This means they're totally unconscious in their communication and aren't sure why they're saying or doing what they do. In this type of 
communication we are living out of the past and communicating and living based on past experiences and past events. In other words, communicating the same way over and over and expecting a different or better result.

2) People communicate to inform. This means to simply communicate with the intention to share information. 

3) People communicate with the intention to influence. This can be either a conscious or an unconscious act. Simply a discussion between two people about which restaurant they'd 
each like to have dinner could be an attempt by each person to influence. We all use the intention to influence anytime we are trying to convince someone to do it our way. 

4) Finally, people communicate with the intention to connect. This is where most of us spend the least amount of time. We believe this should be where we spend most of our time if we are interested in creating more conscious, connected, vital alive and loving relationships. 
I realize that this is a very simplistic way of describing how people communicate and that most of us use a combination of all of these ways in their daily lives.

The fourth area, discovering how to communicate with the intention to connect, is where we will spend the bulk of our time together in this e-course. I'll be sharing ideas with you on how, through improving your communication, you can connect deeper, understand the people in your life more and feel more understood yourself. 

As you'll discover throughout this course, if you keep the intention to connect as your primary intention in all of your relationships, you will have more harmony (instead of drama) 
and more passion (instead of apathy). 

Communication Challenges:

It is our opinion that almost all of the communication challenges we have are because we are not clear about our own intentions and we are communicating from a place of fear 
instead of love. 

We all have developed communication challenges along the way--unhealthy patterns that separate us from the people in our lives. Even though we may not label these challenges as fear, most often, it is fear that we allow to get in the way of being our full, authentic selves and creating the relationships and life we want. 

For us, even though we have a great relationship and consciously attempt to communicate clearly, we sometimes lapse into old patterns when conflict comes up. We're 
guessing that you do the same.

These old patterns usually manifest in unhealthy ways like being afraid to speak her truth if it's 
unpleasant for the other person to hear, agreeing for the sake of keeping the peace, and not clearly asking for what you want.

Another communication challenge is--- making assumptions, fearing the future, black and white thinking, and not speaking about what's bothering you but letting resentments 
build up.

So what gets in the way of your ability to communicate with the people in your life? 

Are you immediately defensive when someone starts to criticize something you are doing or calls attention to something you could improve? Do you think one thing and say another? Is 
your mind always somewhere else instead of listening to the people in your life? 
Take a few moments now and write down the communication 
challenges you face and ways you stop connections with other 
people. 


Clear, honest communication is a skill that can be learned if you have the desire to do so. All that is required is that you make the decision to start communicating with the intention 
to connect and be willing to face whatever fears you have.

Making yourself aware of your particular communication issues is one of the first steps to creating close, connected relationships. 

That's it for the introduction. Your first lesson on creating intentions and agreements will be sent to you tomorrow. 

0 comments:

Post a Comment

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...

Relationships and Sex

Relationships and Sex

 
Powered by Blogger