Perhaps one of the biggest reasons that people fail in relationships
is...
They aren't clear about what they want, what's important to them and
their lives aren't in alignment with their values.
Before you can tell others what you want, you have to know what is
important to you. We've discovered that many relationships that are
in trouble are in the shape they are in because one or both people
either don't know what's important to them or their actions aren't in
alignment with their values.
We'll explain what we mean...
Many people say they want a great relationship but they spend the
majority of their time at work or attending social and community
groups, leaving very little if any time to connect with their
partner.
We suggest that you be very clear inside yourself how you want to
live your life and then live it accordingly. If you say your kids
are the most important people in your life, then spend time with
them. If you say your connection to your partner is most important,
then allow your life to reflect that. Do whatever is necessary to
first find out what you truly value and then begin spending your time
and energy cultivating those areas of your life.
A good way to begin doing this is to make a list of what is most
important to you and then rank the items in your list. Then chart
how you actually spend your time for one week. Next, compare your
list of what you value most with how you are actually spending your
time.
Ask yourself these questions-
"Am I spending my time according to what I value most?"
"How can I pay attention more to the things that I value most?"
If one of those "things" that you value most is your relationship and
you aren't spending the time and energy to keep it growing and
strong, begin to find ways to do that. If you do, your relationship
stands a much better chance of lasting and growing into something
very wonderful.
is...
They aren't clear about what they want, what's important to them and
their lives aren't in alignment with their values.
Before you can tell others what you want, you have to know what is
important to you. We've discovered that many relationships that are
in trouble are in the shape they are in because one or both people
either don't know what's important to them or their actions aren't in
alignment with their values.
We'll explain what we mean...
Many people say they want a great relationship but they spend the
majority of their time at work or attending social and community
groups, leaving very little if any time to connect with their
partner.
We suggest that you be very clear inside yourself how you want to
live your life and then live it accordingly. If you say your kids
are the most important people in your life, then spend time with
them. If you say your connection to your partner is most important,
then allow your life to reflect that. Do whatever is necessary to
first find out what you truly value and then begin spending your time
and energy cultivating those areas of your life.
A good way to begin doing this is to make a list of what is most
important to you and then rank the items in your list. Then chart
how you actually spend your time for one week. Next, compare your
list of what you value most with how you are actually spending your
time.
Ask yourself these questions-
"Am I spending my time according to what I value most?"
"How can I pay attention more to the things that I value most?"
If one of those "things" that you value most is your relationship and
you aren't spending the time and energy to keep it growing and
strong, begin to find ways to do that. If you do, your relationship
stands a much better chance of lasting and growing into something
very wonderful.
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